My Secret Dance Journal

8/25/07

I'm not sure why, but all my hip hop moves look a bit violent. Maybe next I will sign up for a self-defense class.

No really, this week was a challenging one. This was the week where the wheat separated from the chaff! The third lesson in a five lesson set is where you really learn who's into it. My observations from today's session:

girl with PINK written on her butt waaay into it
her friend in the cutoff college intramural t-shirt waay into it
old lady who had her friend tell the instructor she couldn't make it due to back pain from last week nooot that into it

me, oh yes, i'm still into it. perhaps more so than i care to admit or would like to be. I arrived my usual 20min. early...and started tearing up as I watched this lovely couple practice the Waltz...Scott and Ninida(???) From the way they moved together it was easy to assume they were instructors practicing for a show. I allowed my mind to go there... slow slow quick quick slow

(*see photo above...playing the part of me is the nice quiet Asian man : )

around and around the dance floor. i watched their feet, felt the movement shift.

I must have been sitting there smiling like a ninny because when they suddenly stopped Scott the male dancer smiled and clapped to himself "Ooo let's do it again...” encouraging his partner who had erred or broken form..."Our audience LOOOVED it."

(YES she did, she loved it! but...)

AUDIENCE??? i couldn't help but fight back the tears... damnit i don't want to be some Sanjiya lovin freak!

I am a HIP HOP DANCER in deep meditative mental preparation for my third ABLE bodied dance class! darnit.

That's when the couple walked over, shook my hand, i think they were going to pat me on the head... but instead introduced themselves...(Scott and Blahblahblah???) and called me Samanda : (

Samanda is hardly the name of a hip hop dancer!

Anyway,

Here are my moves for this week. hope you enjoy. (*just for anyone new who might be reading this. i have a spinal cord injury...)

http://web.mac.com/amv12/iWeb/Site/hiphoplesson3.html

http://homepage.mac.com/amv12/iMovieTheater10.html (Windows users)


Happy Monday

A-Lo/Amanda

Hip Hop Dance Class cont...

There is a Zen saying “Not One, Not Two.”

The Zen Master is talking about the relationship that exists when you look inward and think about your fellow man. You and the guy thumping the cardboard sign as you pull up to the stoplight are “Not One” but if even for a moment you lock eyes you realize you’re also “Not Two.” Your thinking might go, there’s something in me that is you and his…if my mama hadn’t beaten me with her broken stripper pole (empty vodka bottle) when I was two, I might be you.

My point, there is a connection that you cannot explain that makes up part of this human existence…

And further, hence, and hereforth…I do not yet fully understand the deeper intricacies of this saying. If I want to go further in my Buddhist practice, the sage suggestion is to go on retreat. My Budilicious body says that’s a bunch a who-ha. Same lessons can be learned through diligent hip hop dancing.

After simply seconds of meditation here’s what I’ve been able to journal and discover about life after reflecting on my experiences in dance class #1 and dance class #2. (sorry folks, the writing's a little rough this week but still...)

Hope it’s fun. Happy Monday.

Amanda

Hip Hop Lesson cont.


Laurie the hip hop dance instructor was well muscled and athletic,

I imagined her as what would have happened if one of the Williams sisters had taken up dance class. She’d been dancing since she could breathe and God had stamped her every step with power, poise and kick ass confidence.

With bright eyes and a smile she teased us “Am I in the right place? They told me I was teaching the advanced hip hop class...” then broke out a spontaneous set of moves that sent one woman running for the door shrieking…no really, our responses assured her we’re all beginners here.

The music started. “Okay, I’m gonna count or go uh-uh, pa pa, just follow me…”

Twelve pairs of eyes stared back and twelve sets of knees nervously bounced and buckled.

“Come on give it to me. I need your energy!” Laurie motioned back and forth the connection between us. She had me! My heart leapt, my mind soared through the blue among the clouds, as the burden of my body fell away. I watched her for a moment…my old friend returned “Athletic Me!”

I watched her embody my energy then felt what’s left of my frozen inside get sucked down through the soles of my shoes…leaving me empty.

“Can I get a little more uh, uh…that girl already gonna bust us out. shakin that booty.” I stood and watched the rest of the class come to life…I yearned for a life where I could shake it with the word PINK written on my butt and feel happy.

I did my best to smile and not suck the energy out of the room with my endless doubt and self-obsessing.

Instead I sought a mindful present and inner clarity...pushed myself gently forward minding my discoveries... (blah, blah, blah...LET'S BOOGIE!)

Oh good lordy, here's the moves from Lesson #2. (No worries, if you laugh. I’m laughing too : ).

http://web.mac.com/amv12/iWeb/Site/lesson%202%20with%20mitty-mix-a-lot.html

http://homepage.mac.com/amv12/iMovieTheater9.html (for Windows users)

(for dial-up connection users) ...Dad, no stress. I will bring the laptop home and show you : )

Hip Hop Dance Class

"Are there still spaces open in your group hip hop class?"

I did not want to explain my elaborate strategy—I will stand in the back and use my keen powers of observation to mentally note the moves…then do what I assume is the equivalent of picking your nose in an empty elevator...practice my "Solid Gold" moves in the privacy of my own dance studio (the restroom).

Nervously, I held the phone tighter and rehearsed my next query...

"You’re open to people of all abilities right?"

"Oh yes," she sounded surprised, but confident...if not mildly amused.

In a friendly voice, she assured me she teaches ballroom, had taken the hip hop class and it was great fun…I would see.

Well, okay, but you’ve never seen this, I thought. I’m tired of explaining and trying to make everything okay for these people. The sort of folks willing to overlook science in favor of enthusiasm. People for whom a spinal cord injury is a hitch in the gait not a hindrance to executing physical talents and abilities.

"Wear comfortable clothes and arrive a little before 10:00am!" she then bubbled a good bye... (arrrg)

So...I arrived a little before 10am in my mumu and slippers...no no really,

I went to my first ever "hip hop" dance class this Saturday…I danced on my feet, near a structural column for support in case I lost my balance.

In my attempt to perhaps encourage you to let go and try new things (…something we allll need help with), I have posted my new moves at:

http://web.mac.com/amv12/iWeb/Site/ahiphopmove.html


http://homepage.mac.com/amv12/iMovieTheater8.html (for Windows users)

hope it's fun.

happy monday,

amanda

Aug. 9th is National Hug a Tree Day...

http://homepage.mac.com/amv12/.Public/mindfulmonday.mp4
[AUDIO]

Good morning,

This weekend I learned it takes 17 muscles to smile…43 to frown. I’m not sure how many it takes to blink back tears and swallow hard.

I paid attention in my high school history class. I mean I know Abe Lincoln chopped down the cherry tree, Denzel Washington was one of the first black men to fight in the Civil War, and Jason Priestly is in Tombstone…

…what? oh (mitty is frowning)

okay, I might not have paid attention early on but I did eventually learn... Apollo 13 was under the command of Major Tom Hanks.

No, really, this weekend I was surprised (and saddened) to re-learn today is the 62nd anniversary of the first atomic bomb dropping.


Hiroshima, Japan August 6, 1945

8:15am...

70,000 people died instantaneously from the force of the blast...imagine being hit by a force that equals the combined weight of 15 cars and a heat of approx. 4000 C. (The temperature on the surface of the sun is 5700C).

i can't.

Those were not the only casualties. Survivors and relief workers experienced radiation exposure ranging several miles out from the hypocenter. Many would die in the months that followed.

According to the Hiroshima Peace Memorial, 140, 000 innocent people were dead by the end of December 1945.

(And today in America…It’s Wiggle Your Toes Day!)

My question:

How is it that we feel justified standing and shaking a fist after an attack when in the past, we, the U.S., have been such a fire breathing Godzilla?

I believe every loss of life is significant…our country experienced a HUGE loss in the 9/11 attacks. The suffering/grief of individuals cannot be quantified, BUT simply by the numbers the line reads:

Lives lost in 9/11 attacks-- 3,000
Lives lost in 1st A-bomb attack--70,000

("We're #1....we're #1!)

Interesting the difference in cultural response.

When I Googled: Anti-Americanism, Japan, atomic bombs

I found...only a few pop culture critics suggesting the Japanese filmmakers' Godzilla represented the U.S. We were fictionalized as a fire breathing monster whose relationship to the country would change from attacker to protector over the course of the films.

And...Toby Keith wants to give "the attackers," a big black eye…

#1 Courtesy of the Red, White, and Blue!

okay, i say, here are my thoughts. suggestions.

Please let him sing his heart out but do not make him our Secretary of State…stop voting in unqualified public officials due to popularity or celebrity status…let not your vote become a reflection of your American Idol voting!

Second, invest less in heroes and idols…I for one need to reassess my pro-Einstein stance. Einstein played an important part in the development of the A-Bomb. Still an amazing thinker and peace activist...a stumbling point...he signed a letter urging then President FDR to move quickly on the development of a nuclear weapon. In 1933, Adolf Hitler was coming to power. Some physicists feared Germany might be working on their own A-bomb...

...this leaves me to wonder...

How much was Einstein acting on his own strengths (philosophy/theory) and convictions? And how much was he acting based on impassioned phone calls and other people bending his ear...with his ethics and morality already in the review mirror?

my thought?

Invest not too much comfort in your heroes and idols for they are human too.

On August 9th, a second bomb was dropped...over Nagasaki…75,000 more people dead.

11:02 a.m.

(taken from The Nagasaki Atomic Bomb Museum)

"Like the primary target Kokura, Nagasaki was overcast
that morning. With barely enough fuel remaining to
reach Okinawa, The pilot and his crew had to pinpoint
their target in the course of only one run over the
city. By chance a crack opened in the clouds,..The
details of the explosion can be summarized as
follows..."

MINDBLOWING!!!

I can only think of one response. This Thursday, 11:02am hug a tree. Send out loving kindness to the mangled and warped trees (...and people) that managed to somehow survive despite the devastation. If you have the time today, check out:

http://www1.city.nagasaki.nagasaki.jp/na-bomb/trees/treese.html

Trees That Lived Through the Bombing.

...it wasn't long before green sprouts were seen
pushing their way up from the atomic wasteland. Some
of the trees that were thought to have died began to
shoot forth tender new leaves, renewing the hope of
suffering people.

and maybe have a mindful monday.

amanda