what not to bring to church game night

Good Morning,

Getting settled in a new place is never easy...or at least that's what "they" keep telling me (i.e. whoever "they" may be). I guess this is why almost a year after moving here to Kansas this is how I found myself last Friday sitting at my first Church game night.

As the 35mph winds with gusts up to 45mph!!! set in, I decided to go against my stroooong desires to avoid the invitation in the hopeful spirit of meeting good people.

In this respect, the evening was a success. There were many nice couples there...and a nice warm place to sit. Feeling a little lost, there was one more person circling the church game table that I did not invite...my competitive 16 year old that was injured in a car accident. She is very competitive and believes in the Michael Jordan school of gaming and competition...anytime, anywhere I will take you down! GAME ON!!!

Although, I understand that all are welcome...this is noooot who you want to bring to the church game table. For example, when the player to my right wanted to delay her turn by fawning over "The Arnold's" pickled cashews...it's not right to want to reach out and slap her bowl away or yell "Come on Mrs. Mauch! game on!" or chant "BOOOOR-ING!!!"

Anyway, what I'm trying to say or encourage is for anyone like me who feels socially awkward to get out there and do it!

I think being social is the hardest easiest thing to do...

So, quickly checking my invitation...

For my first bit of advice, here are 5 games NOT to Bring to Church Game Night

(*note- the host's invitation may encourage you to bring ANY game you'd like. Do NOT listen!).

1. Battleship- Although still one of America's most popular games. A little isolating to have only 2 players. The object is also very anti-Jesus. If you must, try "LOVE THY NEIGHBOR!" instead of "YOU SUNK MY BATTLESHIP!"

2. RISK!- Leave the dust on this old classic. Not a good idea to show up announcing your desires for war and world domination.

3. Operation






Zap it!!! Never a good idea to surround yourself with a group of strangers, tiny forceps and a nude character.

4. Twister or strip twister- Remember you will probably be with adults who probably have not been drinking. There will probably also be a wheelchair user or two...who does not want to be the designated all-time spinner.

5. Trivial Pursuit Bible edition- Simply stay away from whoever has brought this game. This is not a time to display for everyone how much you do not know about your Bible. Nor do you want them to see the surprised look on your face when someone says "Bible study..."

Alrightee, hope this helps.

Happy Monday,

Amanda

Top 10 Suggestions for Giving Gifts to People with Paralysis

Good Morning,

Last week I shared an alternative Christmas story, this week I thought I'd provide a slightly different take on another holiday tradition--GIFT GIVING!!!

Top 10 Suggestions for Giving Gifts to People with Paralysis

1. Don’t ask them to go try it on for you. This is the opposite spirit of gift giving because you now are asking them to do a workout.

2. Realize that the hug is optional. A simple nod, thumbs up or fist bump can hold just as much meaning and appreciation and is much easier on the balance muscles.

3. Have a little organization to the photo ops. After wassailing and feasting, it never hurts to get up and move some furniture around. Let the one with the least mobility choose where they would like to stand or sit then others fill in accordingly. *Caution try to avoid the disability Santa effect. This is the tendency for the disabled person to be in the center of EVERY photo...

4. Go light on the tape. Although not great for the environment, gift bags are best. I have come to enjoy the challenge of Grandma's four sided Scotch tape safety seal but I think this is rare. Remember noooobody likes having their presents opened for them.

5. Remember "Humility is the love of truth over the love of self." I think this means don’t get too excited with yourself if you come up with the perfect disability item...like... no skid slippers! when what they really want are night vision binoculars!!! It's very good to be humble in our practice of generosity.

6. Also, important, adapted technology for the home can be a bad item for anyone during the holidays, for example, the talking scale.

7. Returns are never easy but they can be a total bear if one must do this pushing a wheelchair through the howling wind of January. A good rule of thumb here is to ask yourself could I write a believable thank you note for this gift I am about to give? If the answer is NO put the item back...or down and just hand out cash.

8. Think your options through. A massage is a wonderful gift. Take a mental test drive through the facilities is it accessible? Are there qualified people there to help? A day of pampering can quickly turn into a day of weird if nude assistance arrives unexpectedly or is unfortunately required.

9. Time and attention. Never rush the disabled person. A special gift you can give is to show genuine interest in letting them tell you their story.

10. Lastly, if you need gift ideas or suggestions

5 items I love because they make my life easier

my wheelie cart
heated neck wrap (it's filled with some kind of good smelling seeds and heats in the microwave)
my Buddha bowl (ergonomically designed to fit the hand and easy to carry)
slip on shoe trackers (excellent over snow and ice)
my iPod

okay, Happy Monday,

Amanda

p.s. Happy Thanksgiving too!!! Travel safe.
p.p.s. One last thought. Help set all doodads and gadgetry before leaving! this includes anything with buttons smaller than a thimble.

meeting with Pastor Holly update...

Good Morning,

Well, my meeting with Pastor Holly went quite well even if the outcome was not expected. As is the way of today's on-the-go culture, we met at a Panera Breads and shared a Pepsi. If there's one thing I took away from the talk, it's this Pastor Holly has run a marathon and has an interesting way of eating an apple...(okay, that's two...)

As we sat outside at a table next to a busy side street, I watched as she pulled a plump red apple and a kitchen knife from her purse. I would describe Holly as a down home girl from Texas. There's a refreshing candor and earnestness when she listens and a pfffft (finger!) to the world when she gets down to business. Still, I was caught a little off guard as she deftly sliced her apple and tossed the seeds, peel, and fleshy extras over the iron gate...right onto the grass!

Our discussion with my reservations and permission, ended up in yesterday morning's sermon. Very strange to hear some of the most intimate details of your life shared so publicly. Thankfully the sermon was long and my story served as an illustrative point not the main message. I'm not sure anyone in the congregation realized Holly was speaking about me and I'd like to keep it that way.

So...

As a far more interesting side note, I'd like to mention that the choir had a soloist this week--a tremendous woman of spirit who goes for the high HIGH note at the end of every song. Finally, standing apart from her peers...a six-foot tall, gray hair woman shaking her shoulders smiling up at the Lord in glee!!!

I thought, well alright then... : ). Let's celebrate her. I witnessed after the service her JOY as she continued singing down the hall and on into the bathroom.

This is the kind of week I'd like for you to have.

Happy Monday,

Amanda

p.s. sorry for the lack of profundity. this topic is a large one to digest.

new meetings...

Good Morning,

I've been wearing so many name tags lately I had to check myself at a house party this weekend to make sure my shirt was not already announcing Hello My Name is…Amanda : ) when meeting people.

Two weekends ago I had "Muffins with the Minister" at a new church...

Over muffins (and grapes I might add...)

I learned things like the difference between “orthodoxy” and “orthopraxy,” how new religion spread across the American frontier, and why perhaps every Wednesday afternoon before CCD class we had orange drink and cheese puffs (...snacks that turned everything orange and melted on tongue contact)--the Catholic church was not built on democracy nor does it rely on shared governance when determining matters inside the church body (my vote woulda been for a cookie and milk!).

Perhaps this is why I never really asked further after the “swishy-legged” nun. I’ve told the story before but as a refresher it basically goes like this…

I was 15 paralyzed from the neck down in a darkened ICU room when an elderly nun walked in swish-swish-swish. I could hear her panty hose as she waddled up beside me and smiled down with a kind grandmotherly face. I cried "why did this happen?" I apologized for whatever sins I might have done…sometimes I am mean to my brother…sometimes I like to act like a big shot…I mean sometimes I showoff in sports…i forged my parents signature on my take home practice sheet for my trumpet...

I cried "I'm sorry! I'm a good kid I swear!"

Feeling incredibly abandon I asked, "Does God care that this happened to me?"

The Nun's response was

Yes God cared. He was in fact there. She told me to imagine it as if God was sitting atop a very tall building and he yelled down "I care for you Amanda" but he was too far away at my accident so I couldn’t hear him...

His voice just didn’t carry that far.

Sister Swishy Legs smiled down lovingly, patted me on the shoulder and left. She returned later to offer me Communion which I could not take because I wasn’t eating at the time…I know in these words you cannot hear me so I will admit there was/is frustration in my voice.

So...

Now almost 19 years later, I thought I’d give the "Muffin Minister" Pastor Holly a shot. I am meeting with her tomorrow to discuss and ask questions.

After five good years exploring and studying Buddhism, I find myself an open and willing audience. I do not expect miracles but I would like to welcome Christianity? God? Jesus?into my life. I'm sitting down to talk with someone (i.e. a religious woman) tomorrow I admire and respect.

I guess my point is...I was raised Catholic and do not feel it is wise or virtuous to runaway from the basic roots of one’s understanding or connections to love and faith. I have a private understanding that will grow and because I think it may help others in their journeys to come to terms with difficult things I will also share some of the insights, understanding, observations and conclusions I come to…

in time.

okay, Happy Monday,

Amanda

Halloween Costume Suggestions

Good Morning,

A little change to the program this week. The "spirit" was not with me Monday morning so I thought I'd move it to Wednesday...wohoo get crazy jump around!!!

The topic I had to discuss was Halloween costumes for people in wheelchairs. While the disabled child (or adult) could essentially be anything they want, wouldn't there also be some best practices or strategies for those who want to incorporate the chair into their costume?

Indeed there are! At least from my research, I've been able to cull some of the most popular themes and offer a few of my own suggestions...

*Note while these suggestions are kid focused my advice is not limited to parents of small children. It is for adults or anyone who would like to work a wheelchair into their next holiday gathering...where there is booze. : )

Halloween Costume Suggestions...

1. Make the chair into the child’s favorite vehicle. Using a sizable box as the car frame and creative extras to add details, you can create a race car, a fire truck... For those in the "Martha Stewart advanced class" you may even try the Fred Flintstone car...the child then provides the motor and wheels. (see photo)



2. Turn the wheelchair into another mode of transportation. My absolute favorite here is the magic carpet ride.



This is also perhaps a good time to mention that it is always important to consider age appropriateness when choosing your costume...hmmm

3. Make your weakness your strength. Play to the disability theme. Go as a skier who blew out a knee…a gassed tri-athlete needing wheelchair medical assistance, a motorcross racer who did not land the jump. Popular now for the boys might be Brett Favre (a 41 yr. old and often injured NFL quarterback) who most recently has been seen being driven off the field on a motorized medical cart.

4. Look for famous historical figures who have been notable wheelchair users.

Former president Franklin Delano Roosevelt is a good one. You could also perhaps institute this presidential theme and be Abraham Lincoln sitting on his "throne" in the Lincoln Memorial.

5. Look to current pop culture for entertainment stars and celebrities you might like to celebrate. For example, the young man in Glee- nerdy Glee club member Artie Abrams or disability rights advocate Lady Gaga???




6. Go as any occupation where you are synonymous with your work instrument. For example, a TV news anchor, a sports analyst...this is what I've chosen. A welcome addition I'm sure to the ESPN College Game Day crew.



7. Okay, and lastly in keeping with this theme. Go as a statement of curiosity. Go as Dwayne Wade (a megastar NBA basketball player) in a wheelchair after a shoulder dislocation...You don't even have to shrug your shoulders to try to explain. Just be cool.

Alright, hope you are having a Happy Monday kind of week,

Amanda